Writing From The Inside Out 2021 Week 34 Prompts
Based on Al Zolynas’ Under Ideal Conditions
Read the poem
Do your own reflection on it, noting what it inspires in you
Feel free to use your own reflection as your prompt or…
Use the selection of prompts below the poem
Pick one that inspires you and write (feel free to use only one or write several poems using different prompts) or…
Don’t use any of the provided prompts and follow your inspiration from wherever it comes
Under Ideal Conditions
say in the flattest part of North Dakota
on a starless moonless night
no breath of wind
a man could light a candle
and walk away
every now and then
he could turn and see
the candle burning
seventeen miles later
provided conditions remained ideal
he could still see the flame
somewhere between the seventeenth and eighteenth mile
he would lose the light
if he were walking backwards
he would know the exact moment
when he lost the flame
he could step forward and find it again
back and forth
dark to light light to dark
what’s the place where the light disappears?
where the light reappears?
don’t tell me about photons
and eyeballs
reflection and refraction
don’t tell me about one hundred eighty six thousand
miles per second and the theory of relativity
all I know is that place
where the light appears and disappears
that’s the place where we live
Al Zolynas
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My Thoughts
Al Zolynas’ poem, under ideal conditions, is a clever homage to Einstein. Einstein developed his theory of relativity using thought experiments about our perception of and relationship to light. Einstein imagined riding on a light beam at the speed of light with a flashlight and wondering what would happen if he turned it on. Zolynas does his own thought experiment about our relationship to light in this poem. He even makes reference to Einstein‘s theory. I doubt that he actually conducted an experiment lighting a candle on a starless moonless night in North Dakota and then drove away to see how far he could go before he would no longer see the candle’s light. The poem sets that scene up so beautifully that it feels as if he could have done it.
The poet declares that there is a point, somewhere between 17 and 18 miles away, where you stand at the liminal edge of the candlelight’s reach, where you can step back and the light will disappear or step forward and the light will appear. I really love the way Zolynas’ poem relentlessly moves towards its conclusion. He stays true to the extended metaphor all the way through to the end. Some poems are made great by unexpected leaps or by words or images that jar the reader or listener into attention or by evoking powerful emotions. Zolynas does not use such maneuvers in this poem. The terrestrial metaphor guides the reader step-by-step. In this regard, the structure of the poem reflects the message. He gradually takes you to that liminal edge and then turns you around, in the last stanza, in order to see our relationship to light in a new way.
To learn more about Al Zolynas:
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/al-zolynas-5f7619501d95c
Under Ideal Conditions is posted online here:
https://capa.conncoll.edu/zolynas.ideal.htm#IDEAL
Prompt Menu
Use the poem title as your prompt: under ideal conditions…. You could write about what those ideal conditions are or what emerges when they are present
Zolynas’ opening stanza places the reader in a vast space of darkness, but that is still grounded, using the metaphor of the flattest part of North Dakota on a starless moonless night. Journal or write a poem as if you are starting from that place.
The poet implies a periodic looking back, checking if the light is still visible. Consider something that you repeatedly look back on or check on. It could be the practical act of looking back before you leave a place to make sure you have everything or the repeated looking back on a wound or a pain to see if it has changed or the need to continually check on a child sleeping or a loved one that is ill or a tendency to revisit certain thoughts or memories.
Write by answering the questions Zolynas poses: What’s the place wher light disappears? where it reppears? If light represents awareness, write about what allows you to come into or out of awareness in life.
Describe what it is like to be between light and dark, or between conscious and unconscious, or between dreaming and waking.
Zolynas declares that the place where the light appears and disappears is the place, existentially, where we live. What, to you, might be the place where we humans live?
Write a poem or prose piece using extended metaphor that might lead the reader to some insight or conclusion about life or how we live.
For a real stretch, write in a way that the structure of the writing reflects the message, either through layout, linebreaks, or content.
As usual, right about anything else from the poem or from life that inspires you.